Post 2672
- 11 years and 172 days since I started this blog -
After my brother died last Tuesday, I was in sad shock - but drove down to Brooklyn Wednesday, and took care of the arrangements.
Although a very professional and warm funeral director made that easy, it was still uncomfortable, sad, and expensive. Dying in America isn't cheap or easy.
I stayed for three more days and drove back. All my memories are of traffic. I spent a lot of time in traffic.
I will remember my brother warmly. He brought something unique to my life, and our time together in the last fifteen years or so became a bit ritualized around the things we shared with each other, and nobody else.
There is no replacing him in my life.
But right now, as I write this, I'm angry with him. For someone who was on the edge of death for twenty years, since his silent heart attack was discovered, he left a mess for his wife after he was gone.
Although a very professional and warm funeral director made that easy, it was still uncomfortable, sad, and expensive. Dying in America isn't cheap or easy.
I stayed for three more days and drove back. All my memories are of traffic. I spent a lot of time in traffic.
I will remember my brother warmly. He brought something unique to my life, and our time together in the last fifteen years or so became a bit ritualized around the things we shared with each other, and nobody else.
There is no replacing him in my life.
But right now, as I write this, I'm angry with him. For someone who was on the edge of death for twenty years, since his silent heart attack was discovered, he left a mess for his wife after he was gone.
Everything in his name. He did all the finances. He kept his stuff on the computer, but didn't always update his list of passwords, or ever record, or make shortcuts to, the web sites he used to manage the family economy.
His wife did not, does not, even know how to turn on the computer. She never operated a computer. She never had a smart phone, either. And their insular lifestyle now means she is completely alone. No friends or family within two-hundred and fifty miles of her.
So I'm worried about that.
I had to come back up for an appointment today to remove a little growth on my right leg that turned into a pre-surgical conference on the patch of skin cancer found on my left ear. That will be removed in a three-to-four hour procedure tomorrow.
I'm grateful for the care I'm getting, and for being able to help my sister-in-law.
Food and Diet
I'm grateful for the care I'm getting, and for being able to help my sister-in-law.
Previous Weight (6/15/21): 197.7 lbs.
Net Loss/Gain: + 4.4 lbs.
Diet Comment
Food Log
Breakfast
3:05pm: Brussels sprouts with scrambled eggs, mushrooms, onions and peppers and shaved parmesan cheese.
Lunch
Skipped.
Dinner
11:55pm: Air-popped popcorn with olive oil and 'everything but the bagel' seasoning, and a Quest bar.
Liquid Intake
3:05pm: Brussels sprouts with scrambled eggs, mushrooms, onions and peppers and shaved parmesan cheese.
Lunch
Skipped.
Dinner
11:55pm: Air-popped popcorn with olive oil and 'everything but the bagel' seasoning, and a Quest bar.
Liquid Intake
Espressos: 0; Coffee: 24 oz.; Water: 84+ oz.;
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