#1337: Monday, December 29 - Gregorian calendar

Post 1337, Day 363 of 2014
- 1,459 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

I think it is pretty funny the importance some people place on New Year's when it comes to non-fiscal matters.

It reeks of superstition. It is as if our calendar had relevance when it comes to the (non-financial) matters in life. Here's a clue: It doesn't. It's entire purpose is organizational, not substantive. It is arbitrary in illogical, if not completely unreasonable ways.

Yet, I am hearing a lot about how "2014 was awful. I can't wait for the year to be over!" As if there was any need to wait to start fixing an 'awful' situation. Or as if, the dates themselves determined your interaction with the rest of the world. I know that if I was having a shitty year, I wouldn't wait for some arbitrary calendar date to begin changing my thinking to effect change in my circumstances.

I realize it's a controversial idea, that you change your life by changing your thoughts, but that's how I think change happens - on a personal level.

Other than changing your thoughts, and as a result, your behavior, I don't know how else to make change. I admit, I'm not even sure any person can make change happen, but what are the alternatives?...

Except to not resist change. That wouldn't give you any influence over the changes (although I think it is an effective way to deal with bad circumstances - change your ). At least, it recognizes that change is constant and all situations, good and bad, are temporary.

Now, at the transition of 2014 to 2015, I'll play a song, and then start packing up. It isn't that unusual for me to be playing at Midnight on a Wednesday, maybe a little later than usual, but not by much.

It's just another day, and the year has no meaning to the non-superstitious. Good and bad things happened to everybody, and will keep happening in the future, as long as the future keeps arriving.

Food and Diet Section

2014 Daily Weight

Today's Weight:                   208.2 lbs

Previous Weight (12/24):          207.0 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:                + 1.2 lbs

Diet Comment

Given the excesses of my eating on my Christmas vacation in Vermont, I'm very happy with my results.

Food Log

Breakfast
Quest bars.

Lunch

Roasted turkey breast chopped salad: baby kale, baby spinach, chard, cole slaw mix, black beans and balsamic vinaigrette.

Snack
Quest bars.

Dinner
A lentil-quinoa frittata, with bacon, organic eggs, onions, peppers, kale and spicy tomato oil.

Liquid Intake   Coffee:  32 oz.   Water: 108+ oz. 

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!

 

#1336: Wednesday, December 24 - Long-term friendship

Post 1336, Day 358 of 2014
- 1,454 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

As you read this, I'm on vacation in Brattleboro, Vermont, thanks to my four-day holiday weekend. Thank you, Jesus!

I'm visiting friends and their families I have known since I was seven years old. I have two such in Vermont. The ones I'm staying with will also be visited by a third friend and his family - I have known him since I was eleven.

I have found, in my travels and various locales, that keeping friends for that long is rare. I have dozens such. In fact, my very first friend was a boy I literally bumped baby carriages with when we were toddlers, and I can call him on the phone right now.

These aren't magic friendships. And not everyone I've ever met is a friend, and of course, over the years, some have fallen away. But at every stage of my life, I have friends to testify to my presence in their lives, in their scenes, however fleeting or durable.

All I have ever done to maintain such relationships is be willing and available. That's it.

The luckiest guy I know (me) is also the possessor of another rare friendship factor: I love my relatives, but I also like them and think we'd be friends without the kinship. They have my love unconditionally, and have earned my loyal friendship as well.

What wealth is delivered to the willing!

That's all for now. Back on Monday.

Food and Diet Section

2014 Daily Weight

Today's Weight:                   207.0 lbs

Previous Weight:                  206.8 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:                + 0.2 lbs

Diet Comment

For all purposes, no change. Today is a traveling day, so I'll be nutriting myself almost entirely on Quest bars (I have timed running out of most of my groceries perfectly).

Food Log

Breakfast
A Quest bar.

Lunch
Tuna salad on Ezekiel 4:9 Flax sprouted grain bread.

Snack
Quest bars.

Dinner
In Brattleboro, Vermont: Cheese and crackers, pita and hummus, vegetables and blue cheese dip, various pastries and chocolate.

Liquid Intake   Coffee:  36 oz.   Water: 108+ oz.  A few shots of Jameson's 18yo Reserve.

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!

 

#1335: Tuesday, December 23 - Merry Christmas!

Post 1335, Day 357 of 2014
- 1,453 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

Confession time: I'm not a big fan of Christmas. I'm terribly bigoted about Christianity - having rejected the dogma as it came to me, as early as seven years of age.

I feel pretty much the same about all organized religions. Although I self-identify as a Buddhist, that's probably just so much humbug - me cherry-picking what feels right and leaving everything else out. Also, I'm not really pursuing any spiritual goal, not feeling any spiritually unsatisfied corner of myself. Still, I'm not now and never have been a follower of any particular flavor of Buddhism, nor participated in any group practice.

I'm a church of one.

In the past, when I could, I'd get out of town for the holidays. Going to Jamaica or Europe in December, not coming back until after New Year's. That was a thing of my 20s. I don't think I spent a single Christmas in the US in the 70s.

I don't particularly like Christmas songs, either, and they're unavoidable.

Christmas sentiments seem saccharine to me. Not the good-will, God-bless-us-everyone, Joy to the World sentiments - there's nothing to scoff at when people attempt that kind of good outlook. But the commercialization, the stress, the relentless pressure to demonstrate your Holiday spirit, your handling of traditions, your coping with the long nights - bah!

I don't need that. Don't participate and don't want to. I've skipped the Holiday festivities at work, all the Christmas parties (at least the ones I'm not paid to attend).

I'm going to Vermont Christmas Eve, and it will be difficult to avoid the Currier & Ives/Norman Rockwell Christmas scenes, unless we have unseasonably warm weather... Guess what? Christmas Eve, the forecast is for a day with the highs in the 60s here in Syracuse, from whence I will be departing. It's a Christmas miracle.

Merry Christmas!

Food and Diet Section

2014 Daily Weight

Today's Weight:                   206.8 lbs

Previous Weight:                  208.0 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:                - 1.2 lbs

Diet Comment

A day on-plan, a nice loss.

Food Log

Breakfast
A Quest bar.

Lunch

Tuna salad and baby kale, baby spinach, chard, black beans and cole slaw mix.

Snack
Quest bars.

Dinner
At Bradshaw Blues rehearsal:  Sauteed chicken, sweet potato, mixed salad with blue cheese dressing.

Snack
Celery and home-made mayonnaise with aged provolone and a Quest bar.

Intake   
Coffee:  28 oz.   Water: 96+ oz. 

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!

 

#1334: Monday, December 22 - Cocker

Post 1334, Day 356 of 2014
- 1,452 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

For better or worse, I don't listen to music like an audience member anymore. I get crazy analytical. It isn't anything I try to do, or anything that I turn on or off.

It is the rare performance that takes me out of that place. I am very, very grateful when that happens.

I'm thinking about this today because one of the first people who ever sparked this overly-analytical approach to music, Joe Cocker, died today.

To be clear, I really, really loved Joe Cocker, the vocalist.

Not so much the bands that were put behind him. The first album, full of British studio aces, was also full of over-the-top and, to me, tasteless arrangements. An attempt to put him squarely in a Ray Charles-if-he-did-rock'n'roll bag. But Brother Ray didn't do r'n'r - he did Ray Charles. He wrote the music, did the arrangements, hired and rehearsed the musicians himself. He controlled his music.

Joe Cocker wasn't a songwriter. He wasn't musically literate, did no arrangements. Maybe that's what led to the disconnect for me.

What happened to him, being handled, being told, "Just sing, we'll take care of everything else." may have been exactly what he wanted, but it resulted in the original 'Star Search'-like music settings. Only the quietest ballads (You Are So Beautiful) escaped.

The song selection and vocals (including backup singers) from the Mad Dogs and Englishmen tour/albums/movies were even more excessively wrong, as far as I was concerned. As great a keyboardist, producer and sideman as Leon Russell is, I disliked the band arrangements. So over-the-top. And, although everyone that ever played with Cocker was an A-list, virtuoso musician, for the most part, I didn't like the bass player's lines. I saw the Grease Band and Mad Dogs and Englishmen live, and felt totally isolated in the audience of uncritically cheering fans, screaming encouragement for every musical (and non-musical) excessive gesture (throughout the performance), obscuring the performance of Cocker himself.

This type of musical grand-standing is also the polar opposite of what I do when I make music, and what I try to do when I'm figuring out my bass lines in the songs I play.

Both of my bands do covers of songs covered by Joe Cocker, and in both bands, everybody but me prefers his version (the musical arrangement) over the original. I do my best to undermine that intent by playing a bass line as different as it can be from what Joe Cocker's bass players did.

RIP, Joe Cocker. To me, you were always the brightest light in the music you made.

Food and Diet Section

2014 Daily Weight

Today's Weight:                   208.0 lbs

Previous Weight (Friday, 12/19):  208.2 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:                - 0.2 lbs

Diet Comment

I ate well over the weekend, but ate for taste, not for health, then cut back on Sunday, and this is the result.

Food Log

Breakfast
A Quest bar.

Lunch
A cocoa-hemp-kale protein shake (almond-coconut milk, kefir, kale, large organic egg, whey powder (36g protein), hemp seeds, hemp protein (7g protein), celery, raw organic cacao powder, fermented coconut water, chia gel, moringa leaf powder, cinnamon and stevia-inulin blend.

Dinner
Pepperoni and aged provolone cheese with cole slaw and black beans.

Snack
Celery and home-made mayonnaise.

Intake   
Coffee:  44 oz.   Water: 64+ oz. 

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!

 

#1333: Friday, December 19 - Good night to a good night

Post 1333, Day 353 of 2014
- 1,449 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

I love that this picture, taken tonight, looks like I'm labeled a Fool. Being a Fool (a real Fool, not the 3 Stooges era definition) ia a noble thing.

Fools find ways to make the truth entertaining. Comedians are often Fools, in that sense.

The real reason I like this picture (at the moment, anyway) is that it reminds me of a very good night (which tonight was), capping off a very good week.

The joy making music brings me, that's my truth.

Food and Diet Section

2014 Daily Weight

Today's Weight:             208.2 lbs

Previous Weight:            209.4 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:          - 1.2 lbs

Diet Comment

A little better, but it will get worse. No way this weekend is going to stay on-plan.

Food Log

Breakfast
A cocoa-hemp-kale protein shake (almond-coconut milk, kefir, kale, large organic egg, whey powder (36g protein), hemp seeds, hemp protein (7g protein), celery, raw organic cacao powder, fermented coconut water, chia gel, moringa leaf powder, cinnamon and stevia-inulin blend.

Lunch

Eggs scrambled with baby kale and spinach, peppers and onions, spicy tomato oil, and a side of bacon. Not shown: A mixed salad and Sauteed greens from a Christmas Party.

Snack
A Quest bar.

Dinner
A Quest bar.

Snack
Birthday cake (chocolate, two big pieces.

Intake   
Coffee:  28 oz.   Water: 80+ oz. A shot of something brought and drunk on-stage. 

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!

 

#1332: Thursday, December 18 - Too tired

Post 1332, Day 352 of 2014
- 1,448 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

I went straight from work to the Monroe Muffler shop and got my brakes all fixed last night. $1200, but you can't screw around with brakes on a car.

When I got home, in my mailbox, was a coupon from Monroe Muffler for a 10% discount for the brake job I'd had estimated.

Tomorrow, I'll try to get that coupon applied retroactively.

I got home, hungry, made a little dinner and ate. Then I did some emotional eating and ate almost the entire gift basket I got from Stacy and Alex. It worked out. I relaxed and fell asleep before the opening credits of whatever it was that I was watching on the DVR. Covered in crumbs.

I woke up in my recliner at 6:05, sleeping through the alarm in my bedroom.

So it goes.

Food and Diet Section

2014 Daily Weight

Today's Weight:             209.4 lbs

Previous Weight:            206.2 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:          + 3.2 lbs

Diet Comment

This was anticipated. Ugly, but expected. Modified fasting today.

Food Log

Breakfast
Skipped.

Lunch
Two Quest bars.

Snack
A Quest bar.

Dinner
A kale, Spring Mix and cole slaw mix salad with Kerry Gold Dubliner cheese (grass-fed cows in Ireland) and balsamic vinaigrette. Celery and home-made mayonnaise.

Snack
Popcorn. Crackers and spicy cheese. Lindt truffles. Wonderfully good, but oh, my!

Intake   
Coffee:  0 oz.   Water: 72+ oz.

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!

 

#1331: Wednesday, December 17 - Silver linings everywhere

Post 1331, Day 351 of 2014
- 1,447 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

I feel lucky. As far as I can tell, in my life every so-called bad break has been the basis for something good to happen - something that otherwise wouldn't or couldn't have happened otherwise.

I am not naive enough to think that this is the way it always is, or that it is this way for everybody. But near the top of the list of things I am grateful for (everything) is that little gem, that gift from my mother (who never really believed it, but another story), given to me frequently growing up: "Everything turns out for the best."

Now, it is true that, in the heat of the moment, the place where panicked thinking has replaced any sort of reason, I forget this core principle. But at those times, whether or not I am reminded of it, as soon as I've had a chance to do even a little processing I remember.

It is very calming. Except that if I have forgotten it, or stopped trusting it, and remember it while I am in 'disaster thinking mode', instead of being calming it is maddening.

But then, I remember it.

And, for me, so far, it is true. Everything turns out for the best.

Or, since good and evil are perceptional abstracts, let's just say that everything turns out.

That's the best.

Food and Diet Section

2014 Daily Weight

Today's Weight:             206.2 lbs

Previous Weight:            209.0 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:          - 2.8 lbs

Diet Comment

Yesterday's plan worked fine. Having eaten my two main meals at restaurants (never good for weight control), I ended the day in a depraved orgy of off-plan eating (no regrets at the moment, but tomorrow's weigh-in is not going to be pretty), I think it is possible that I put on the lost pounds, and then some. Sigh.

Food Log

Breakfast
A Quest bar.

Lunch
At Ling-Ling's Chinese Buffet and Grill:

Brussels sprouts, kimchee, and, from the "Mongolian Grill", my go-to dish: pork and chicken with cabbage, onions, mushrooms, green peppers and broccoli.

Snack
A Quest bar.

Dinner
At the Ridge Tavern: A bacon basket (exactly what it sounds like) and a Greek salad with grilled chicken.

Snack
At Wegman's, post-gig, another box of oatmeal dark chocolate chip cookies, and then, after the after-gig open mic (where I got bought an unnecessary but delicious Jameson's) I went home, and ate a pack of trail mix from the holiday food basket Stacy (thank you!) surprised me with earlier today.

Intake   
Coffee:  28 oz.   Water: 92+ oz. A glass of Pinot Noir, and a Jameson's Irish Whiskey, neat

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!

 

#1330: Tuesday, December 16 - Take mental health days

Post 1330, Day 350 of 2014
- 1,446 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

I woke up feeling blah. It became the theme of the day, at least until I got around to playing music at an i am Fool rehearsal for Friday's gig.

I took the day off from work and went back to bed. Downloaded some movies to add to my crowded Unwatched Movies folder. Watched one or two things off my DVR. Finally, in the late afternoon, went out to get an oil change and my annual inspection.

Bad news there - the car failed to meet inspection standards: It needs new brakes all around. Very expensive. I can't say I'm completely okay with my three-year old car (that I've owned for two) needs a thousand dollars worth of brake repair.

I was over it by the end of rehearsal.

Food and Diet Section

2014 Daily Weight

Today's Weight:             209.0 lbs

Previous Weight:            208.2 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:          + 0.8 lbs

Diet Comment

I didn't pay as big a penalty for my bad behavior as I expected, but today, it's gonna be a nice lunch and some Quest bars with lots of water.

Food Log

Breakfast
Skipped.

Lunch

An organic beef cheeseburger, with cole slaw and a big Spring Mix salad with balsamic vinaigrette.

Snack
A Quest bar.

Dinner
A Quest bar.

Snack
A Quest bar.

Intake   
Coffee:  28 oz.   Water: 80+ oz.

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!

 

#1329: Monday, December 15 - Have no expectations

Post 1329, Day 349 of 2014
- 1,445 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

The great thing about having no expectations is that it avoids disappointments. The not-so-great thing about it is how difficult it is to to undo the programming that tells you to look into the future.

We're all trained from birth that there are things expected of us. Before we're old enough to understand it, we've internalized the idea that, in the future, certain things will happen, people will behave in certain ways, our environment will be consistent.

Thus, a certain arrogance is cultivated by our culture: We confuse our expectations with control. Nobody controls the future.

Even after a lifetime of disappointment when something doesn't meet our expectations, we blame everything but our expectation for that disappointment, frustration, fear.

Why am I thinking about this today? I just had a run-in with Verizon, who've perpetrated a billing error for over two months. I was told many things by customer service, things that would happen. I was given instructions on what to do. If I hadn't managed my expectations, I'd be very angry right now, when more than two months after the initial problem-causing mistake, everything seems to be fixed, but I have been erroneously marked as having a late payment.

About which, apparently, nothing can be done.

If I hadn't managed my expectations (in fact, not assuming that everything would be brought back to 'correct' through my and Verizon Customer Service's efforts) I think I might not have dealt with this situation calmly.

I literally had no expectations of this situation (a ridiculous $400+ overbilling that had no basis at all). I know people who work for Verizon, and have an image of it as a terrible company.

My only thought was to bring it to their attention, and see what happened, and not pay the overcharge.

I got a lot of lip service. Today, finally, the biggest part, though not quite everything from the erroneous charges, was refunded. Another call today, got the rest of the charge refunded. But I spoke to eleven people and can't get the entry of late payment from last month erased. They can only add a note.

On the more pleasant side, when I go out to play, especially at any kind of jam session, I have hopes, but no expectations. I may not get to play; I may play a little; if I play, I may play with good musicians, bad musicians, good musicians who can't jam, or be left with nothing but my bass and repertoire of songs I can sing and play.

Thankfully, the poor jam is rare. And even the least-good one teaches me something. But if my expectation was for a certain amount of playing time with a certain quality of player, not only would I be disappointed so often as to be discouraged from participating, but my own ability to have good players want to play with me would certainly be compromised.

With no expectations, however, when good things do happen, I can be pleasantly surprised, and everything exceeds my (nonexistent) expectations.

I'm hardly perfect at not forming expectations. I mean, conditioning from birth is hard to overcome. But whenever I'm disappointed or frustrated, I remember why: Because I had expectations, and they were incorrect.

2014 Daily Weight

Today's Weight:             208.2 lbs

Previous Weight (12/12/14): 203.4 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:          + 4.8 lbs

Diet Comment

I was kind and unkind to myself as far as eating goes. I'm pretty sure I began gaining weight Friday, having eaten a lot of food, and, in particular, a lot of food I wouldn't have chosen. I was pretty good until Sunday, when I feasted on hummus, eating a whole container at a sitting.

Food Log

Breakfast
A cocoa-hemp-kale protein shake (almond-coconut milk, kefir, kale, large organic egg, whey powder (36g protein), hemp seeds, hemp protein (7g protein), celery, raw organic cacao powder, fermented coconut water, chia gel, moringa leaf powder, cinnamon and stevia-inulin blend.

Lunch

Roasted turkey breast chopped salad: baby kale, baby spinach, chard, cole slaw mix, black beans and balsamic vinaigrette. And a Quest bar.

Snack
A Quest bar.

Dinner
At Ironwood: 

A quarter of a personal pie, with fire-roasted chicken, bacon, prosciutto, basil, caramelized onions, mushrooms, cheese and sauce. After eating the whole pie with a generously full glass pf pinot noir, I decided to have some hand-made chocolate-chili gelato. Just irresistable.

Snack
Oh, my! On my way home from the gig, I had to stop in and do some shopping for a couple of items. Ended up with a bag of oatmeal-dark chocolate chip cookies. I'll pay for that.

Intake   
Coffee:  28 oz.   Water: 80+ oz. A big glass of Pinot Noir.

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!

 

#1328: Friday, December 12 - Too busy having fun

Post 1328, Day 346 of 2014
- 1,442 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

I am looking forward to some more downtime this weekend. Well, Saturday, anyway, because there won't be much available on Sunday.

Today I left work early to head to gig the First. Set up with the band, played for an hour, tore down, packed up, drove 25 miles to gig the Second, set up my stuff and the PA, played for three hours, ate dinner, tore down, drove home, did some en route midnight food shopping at the best Wegman's, got home, put away the perishables, and crashed.

Saturday and Sunday are free, except for pesky errands and my two regular open mics.

I need this time.

It starts again Monday, when I have a gig right after work, a rehearsal Tuesday, another gig Wednesday, and a big gig Friday. 

What a wonderful life, when my biggest complaint is I'm so busy doing wonderful things, I need down time to catch my breath.

Gratitude seems to be the best cure for any negativity. That's something I try to always keep in mind.

Along with the idea that nothing is really negative or positive. I just make that shit up.

2014 Daily Weight

Today's Weight:             203.4 lbs

Previous Weight:            204.4 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:          - 1.0 lbs

Diet Comment

Lost yesterday's gained pound, despite some (delicious) off-plan eating last night.

Food Log

Breakfast
A cocoa-hemp-kale protein shake (almond-coconut milk, kefir, kale, large organic egg, whey powder (36g protein), hemp seeds, hemp protein (7g protein), celery, raw organic cacao powder, fermented coconut water, chia gel, moringa leaf powder, cinnamon and stevia-inulin blend.

Lunch
A Quest bar.

Snack
At Saltine Warrior Sports Bar: Cheese, pizza-ettes. (I was so hungry, and they'd been parading Xmas party food in front of me for two hours at this early gig...) A Quest bar.

Dinner

At Brae Loch Inn: Prime Rib au jus, broccoli, side salad with blue cheese dressing.

Snack
A Quest bar.

Intake   
Coffee:  24 oz.   Water: 98+ oz.

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!

 

#1327: Thursday, December 11 - Adapt or die

Post 1327, Day 345 of 2014
- 1,441 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

Age is just a number, right? However, there are many different ages of a man.

The things I did and enjoyed as a child have very limited appeal to me now, at the other end of the age continuum (the end that hasn't ended yet).

Most of the things I do now for enjoyment, improvement and relaxation are related to, but not the same as the things I did when I was younger. I'd like to think there's some evolution or progression, but I suspect that it is simply the result of physical and emotional changes brought on by my against-all-odds continuing survival.

You know, survive and adapt.

2014 Daily Weight

Today's Weight:             204.4 lbs

Previous Weight:            203.4 lbs

Day Net Loss/Gain:          + 1.0 lbs

Diet Comment

Being at home, inside, all day, what do you do? Eat. Nap. Eat. That was yesterday, hence, up a pound.

Food Log

Breakfast
A cocoa-hemp-kale protein shake (almond-coconut milk, kefir, kale, large organic egg, whey powder (36g protein), hemp seeds, hemp protein (7g protein), celery, raw organic cacao powder, fermented coconut water, chia gel, moringa leaf powder, cinnamon and stevia-inulin blend.

Lunch

A Quest bar.

Dinner

At Small Plates Detroit, a small plate of Beef Bruschetta - tenderloin with mushrooms, onions, peppers, cheese on garlic bread, with fries. OK - this was a fail, but it was late and I hadn't eaten anything since lunch...

Snack
A Quest bar

Intake   
Coffee:  28 oz.   Water: 76+ oz.  and a Jameson's, neat.

Please leave a comment if you visit my blog. Thank you!