#1699, Friday, July 29: The myth of Ken

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Post 1699, Day 211 of 2016
- 2,037 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

Sometimes, I go out, but don't have the energy to socialize. That was the case tonight, when I went to a meetup at a local winery. I met and exchanged introductions to five strangers. I left after a half hour.

The energy is there when I go out and play music, though.

Being someplace where my primary reason is to make music allows me to be with people, open up. It allows me to have another reason than the social need for being among people. It allows me to hide my insecurity, my weakness, my fear, my secrets behind a performer's role. It allows me to let people get close, without letting them all the way in.

And people enable me. They're attracted, and they fill in the blanks with no energy. They make assumptions based on their own internal beliefs. They mythologize.

I answer all questions truthfully, if not fully. I appear open.

I am rarely unguarded. My most spontaneous moments are alone.

Food and Diet

Today's Weight:                      202.0 lbs.

Previous Weight (7/28):              201.6 lbs.

Net Loss/Gain:                     +   0.4 lbs.

Diet Comment

Now sitting right on the trend line heading into the weekend. I think almonds, in the quantity I eat them, may be the problem. Uh-oh.

Food Log 

Breakfast
4:30pm:  Green protein shake with almond-coconut milk, kefir, extra-large organic egg, chia gel, kale, whey powder (36g protein), almond butter, hemp seeds, hemp protein (7g protein), raw organic cacao powder, celery, moringa leaf powder, cinnamon, and stevia-inulin blend.

Lunch
Skipped.

Dinner

2:15am:  Pepperoni, cole slaw, and a Quest bar.

Liquid Intake

   Espressos: 1;  Coffee:  28 oz.;  Water: 64+ oz.

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#1698, Thursday, July 28: Once you ring the meditation bell...

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Post 1698, Day 210 of 2016
- 2,036 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

I meditate often, but not everyday like I used to.

I don't know why it's become happenstance.

Maybe because I think I've gotten to a place where the benefits of doing it aren't as important as the benefit of having done it.

Meditation changes the brain; not meditating doesn't undo those changes.

Just a thought.

Food and Diet

Today's Weight:                      201.6 lbs.

Previous Weight (7/27):              202.2 lbs.

Net Loss/Gain:                     -   0.6 lbs.

Diet Comment

Breaking the trendline in the right direction. I have recovered from the weekend excesses.

Food Log 

Breakfast
4:00pm:  A Quest bar and almonds.

Lunch
7:45pm:  Ground beef with Dubliner cheese and a salad of spinach, Spring mix, cabbage, shaved parmesan, chia and hemp seeds and balsamic vinaigrette.

Dinner

2:45am:  Roast beef with Philippe's hot mustard, and a Quest bar.

Liquid Intake

   Espressos: 0;  Coffee:  0 oz.;  Water: 88+ oz. and a shot of Jameson's

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#1697, Wednesday, July 27: A night of open mics

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Post 1697, Day 209 of 2016
- 2,035 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

Another night of music. I went to four different open mics, played at three.

got to my third stop at the last minute, almost not getting to play, and literally closing the night there. But playing the Wailers' Stir It Up for eight-plus minutes behind Frank Stepanek, outside at the Dinosaur BBQ, got a great crowd reaction - the audience was clapping, singing-along, dancing and smiling a lot.

That made me late for my next stop, and I was pretty far back on the list. I'm such a regular at open mics at Shifty's that when I come in, people make requests! I did a bass-and-guitar set, and got to call and sing the tunes. I thought it went well.

The audience really liked it, giving me attention and a healthy round of applause for every song, then called for one more when I was finished. I'm getting so much better at playing and singing at the same time.

I see a lot of friends at these open mics, this was no exception. Hanging out with my mostly musician friends before the set, drinking my Jameson's after, I had a great time.

And that's today's 'stuff'. Tomorrow? More open mics.

Food and Diet

Today's Weight:                      202.2 lbs.

Previous Weight (7/26):              203.4 lbs.

Net Loss/Gain:                     -   1.2 lbs.

Diet Comment

That's a satisfying loss, returning to the trend line. I'm establishing the direction I hope to take through the weekend. It seems to take a little longer to come back after I've gone off the path these days, but I always do.

Food Log 

Breakfast
Skipped.

Lunch
6:55pm:  Casserole:  Cauliflower, ground beef, dal tadka (lentil curry), chia and hemp seeds.

Dinner

12:45am:  Pepperoni and a Quest bar.

Liquid Intake

   Espressos: 2;  Coffee:  0 oz.;  Water: 96+ oz. and a shot of Jameson's

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#1696, Tuesday, July 26: Lazy man plays bass alot

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Post 1696, Day 208 of 2016
- 2,034 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

I usually think of myself as lazy.

I certainly, when left on my own, as is usually the case these days, will do nothing (or near-equivalents like reading or watching tv or computer-screen nonsense - passive stuff) rather than do housework. And, I have a list of personal improvement projects in music and health a mile long and growing.

So, lazy. Basically.

In my defense, once I actually start a project, I do as much as I can, and I'm tireless. But it takes inspiration to move me to that. Once inspired, I'm tireless.

Nearly.

When it comes to music, I am more active, going out more to play, more to listen to friends play, than anybody else I know. I am known as, and I accept that I am, a bass whore. I'll play with anybody, and look for opportunities as well.

And when I'm not playing?

I'm being lazy.

Food and Diet

Today's Weight:                      203.4 lbs.

Previous Weight (7/25):              203.6 lbs.

Net Loss/Gain:                     -   0.2 lbs.

Diet Comment

Basically the same as yesterday, although it is still nice to see the first minus sign in a while.

Food Log 

Breakfast
1:30pm:  Two Quest bars.

Lunch
6:15pm:  Green protein shake with almond-coconut milk, kefir, extra-large organic egg, chia gel, kale, whey powder (36g protein), almond butter, hemp seeds, hemp protein (7g protein), raw organic cacao powder, celery, moringa leaf powder, cinnamon, and stevia-inulin blend.

Dinner

12:45am:  Pepperoni.

Liquid Intake

   Espressos: 1;  Coffee:  0 oz.;  Water: 72+ oz. 

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#1695, Monday, July 25: Trump is an asshole

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Post 1695, Day 207 of 2016
- 2,033 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

I can't really get involved in Party politics.

I believe the differences between the two parties are real, but the similarities, both parties being tilted towards the wealthy and corporations, are real and more important.

Neither party represents my political view, which is decidedly Socialist-progressive. I supported Bernie, as the only candidate in my lifetime to share most of those views, and will vote for Hillary, because the alternative, Trump in the White House, is repugnant to me.

I have disliked Donald Trump since I've known who he was. The idea that he stands a chance to become President is a damning indictment of our country.

I'm not afraid of Donald Trump. I just think he'd be a shitty President. That being said, in my lifetime, who was in the White House hasn't made any direct difference. I've never been the recipient of any Presidential order, for better or worse.

And I appreciate the limitations put on the powers of the Executive branch.

I don't think Donald Trump is fit to take a tour of the White House.

He is such an asshole.

Food and Diet

Today's Weight:                      203.6 lbs.

Previous Weight (7/21):              201.4 lbs.

Net Loss/Gain:                     +   2.2 lbs.

Diet Comment

I ate rather extravagantly, including a lot of off-plan food, while I was on vacation the last few days, so I'm not surprised that my weight is up. I am surprised by how little my weight was up.

Food Log 

Breakfast
Skipped.

Lunch
7:45pm:  Two salmon burgers with bacon, cole slaw, fresh salsa and a giant salad with Spring mix, spinach, shaved parmesan and balsamic vinaigrette.

Dinner

12:45am:  Almond butter, cottage cheese, and two Quest bars.

Liquid Intake

   Espressos: 1;  Coffee:  0 oz.;  Water: 48+ oz. 

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#1694, Thursday, July 21: Bass playing success

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Post 1694, Day 203 of 2016
- 2,029 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

I'm a good bass player. I'm not, in my opinion, a very good bass player.

I have a sound. I have a style. I can fit my style into a wide variety of music, lots of different genres.

But it's just one sound and one style. It is feel-oriented, and technically, not very sophisticated.

But you always know where the "one" is.

I got shined up last night by another bass player - someone who's the total opposite of me.

He plays more notes in a song than I play in a night. On a bass with seven strings! I, myself, make do with four.

But, I have a reputation for solidity and he has a reputation for chops.

He likes my bass playing much better than I like his, and he knows it. We traded stories last night.

He reminded me of a time when I was invited out to play a short set in a band that was his gig. He listened to me basically jamming on songs he'd rehearsed and prepared. He thought I had a good ear, but wasn't overly impressed with my playing.

At least, not until after I put my bass away and he saw the sound man make his way backstage and give me a big hug. He couldn't hear what was said, but he got it - the sound man was telling me how much he loved my sound. Which is true: He was telling me how much he enjoyed my segment, how great my bass sounded, and how much easier it was to balance the group's sound when I played.

I'm telling you, this guy can play rings around me. Thing is, as good as he is, he overplays all the time. It doesn't sound bad, but it makes you wonder why people (and he) like my sound, when he is delivering so much more.

My sound and my attitude - the secrets of my success.

Note: That's all for this week. Tomorrow is a travel day, heading out to MA to visit my sister Joan.

Food and Diet

Today's Weight:                      201.4 lbs.

Previous Weight (7/20):              201.0 lbs.

Net Loss/Gain:                     +   0.4 lbs.

Diet Comment

A large amount of almonds at one in the morning, and my weight barely budges - essentially flat all week. Then, there will be a weekend eating off-plan celebrating my sister's birthday twenty days after... You'll find out how that went Tuesday morning (when I publish Monday's blog).

Food Log 

Breakfast
4:15pm:  Green protein shake with almond-coconut milk, kefir, extra-large organic egg, chia gel, kale, whey powder (36g protein), almond butter, hemp seeds, hemp protein (7g protein), raw organic cacao powder, celery, moringa leaf powder, cinnamon, and stevia-inulin blend.

Lunch

Skipped.

Dinner

11:45pm:  London broil, Dubliner cheese, celery with homemade mayonnaise and a Quest bar.

Liquid Intake

   Espressos: 0;  Coffee:  28 oz.;  Water: 72+ oz. and a shot of Jameson's

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#1693, Wednesday, July 20: The cooperative thing about open mics

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Post 1693, Day 202 of 2016
- 2,028 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

We used to call them jams. Musicians mixing it up with other musicians. There were blues jams, jazz jams, folk jams. That was my youth.

The idea of playing in them used to scare me. I was intimidated by other musicians who seemed to know the music (music) so much better than I did.

What changed things? The Blue Oyster Cult. Well, not actually. The proto-BOC.

When I was sevemteen, visiting my friend Billy in the still-under-construction campus at SUNY Stony Brook, I met and fell in love with a coed, and started making regular trips out from the City.

In short order, I fell in with a group of musicians jamming, Grateful Dead style, at parties on and off-campus. It became a regular thing, and, especially between semesters in the summer of '67, we got pretty tight.

When I got dumped by the woman, I stopped going out to Stony Brook, and the guys found another bass player. Then, they found another student who was writing articles for those early rock'n'roll magazines (Creem, I think) and was a closet song-writer. He wrote songs for them, became their manager. That group became the Storm Forest Band, then the Soft White Underbelly, and then Blue Oyster Cult.

The point was, I stopped being afraid of jamming with other musicians.

I didn't play in any other group for a few years after that - I just picked up with other musicians, ad hoc. It was easy to do in those hippy days - almost everyone was a musician, and there weren't that many bass players.

Over the ensuing forty-nine years, I've gotten pretty good at it. In fact, it is one of the most fun things I do, musically, and, really, where most of my musical growth has come from. I like the challenge of being asked to play something I haven't played before, or don't know, or in a new style, or just making improvising, creating arrangements on the fly. It focuses me like nothing else in my life.

Best of all, it totally represents human communication, human cooperation.

Food and Diet

Today's Weight:                      201.0 lbs.

Previous Weight (7/19):              201.0 lbs.

Net Loss/Gain:                     +   0.0 lbs.

Diet Comment

Nothing to show for yesterday's eating. Perfect. I thought the low activity/low hydration might add a little.

Food Log 

Breakfast

11:50am, at CoreLife:

Chicken Cobb salad (shredded kale and spinach, grilled chicken, avocado, bacon, hard-cooked egg and blue cheese dressing with a little sriracha). Not shown: a cup of chocolate-vanilla twist soft-serve ice cream.

Lunch

6:15pm:  Cottage cheese and a Quest bar.

Dinner

11:45pm:  Pepperoni and kimchee and a very large portion of almonds.

Liquid Intake

   Espressos: 2;  Coffee:  0 oz.;  Water: 68+ oz. and a shot of Jameson's

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#1692, Tuesday, July 19: Morning routine

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Post 1692, Day 201 of 2016
- 2,027 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

One of the least surprising things that has changed about my life post-retirement is (to me at least) my sleep cycle.

I now go to sleep early in the morning - typically between two and three in the AM. Typically, this is right after my last meal of the day.

I sleep for about 4 hours. Then I get up to pee. Then I check my email and then Facebook. Then I do some sudoku. Then back to sleep, sometimes with the help of a sleep-aid like pot or masturbation.

Which takes me to about Noon. That's when I go to the toilet, take my thyroid hormone (must be on an empty stomach), get back in bed to play on the computer and finish yesterdays's blog post (this) and start today's, check my email, Facebook, stocks, do a sudoku and meditate.

In other words, I do the 'work' of the day in bed. Before I get up.

When I get up out of bed, I go to the bathroom again (I'm very well hydrated, or was until this point) and weigh myself.

Then it's back to bed to prep the weight stuff for the blog, and check my personal finances on Quicken, which I have now been using to track my finances for twenty-five years (imagine that).

What's missing from this list? Oh, yeah - gratitude. Because it is suffusive - it permeates all these other activities. It is background music setting the mood.

This is why, almost every day, I'm in a good mood before I "get out of bed."

(It's also why, except for Wednesdays, when I break routine, I don't have breakfast before the early afternoon, and usually closer to dinner-time).

Food and Diet

Today's Weight:                      201.0 lbs.

Previous Weight (7/18):              201.0 lbs.

Net Loss/Gain:                     +   0.0 lbs.

Diet Comment

Nothing to show for yesterday's eating. Perfect. I thought the low activity/low hydration might add a little.

Food Log 

Breakfast
3:00pm:  A Quest bar.

Lunch
6:10pm:  

Omelet with peppers, onion, greens, chia seeds, hemp seeds, parmesan cheese and bacon.

Dinner
11:45pm:  Pepperoni, kimchee, cole slaw and a Quest bar.

Liquid Intake
   Espressos: 1;  Coffee:  0 oz.;  Water: 90+ oz. 

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#1691, Monday, July 18: How not to relax

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Post 1691, Day 200 of 2016
- 2,026 days since I started this blog -

Daily Comment

The Saturday gig went pretty well. It also included a few moments I'd like to take back, but... So it goes.

The important thing to me was that the music was good, and enjoyed very much by the small crowd. So, it was a very satisfying gig, as far as I was concerned.

I did a lot of work preparing for this gig, and, as I wrote Friday, this, and the prep for the Beatles Cabaret I did the week before, created a bit of anxiety for me.

Doing the gig didn't completely dissipate that anxiety, but I'm working on it. I recorded the gig, and spent some time Sunday editing the recording, laid back, and then went to my as-usual Sunday evening open mics, and had a good time with that.

Today, I spent the entire day editing the recording I made. User error caused me not to record the first two songs - it took seven hours to break the remaining recording - two sets, two-and-a-half hours of music, into thirty individual practice songs.

Since I work on the computer in bed, that's a lot of time on my back.

Stop snickering.

I'm trying to dissipate some tension here.

Physically, about as low-energy a day as could be had.

Which doesn't translate into the rest and relaxation I wanted. Oh, well.

Food and Diet

Today's Weight:                      201.0 lbs.

Previous Weight (7/15):              199.2 lbs.

Net Loss/Gain:                     +   1.8 lbs.

Diet Comment

I don't know - I thought my very on-plan Sunday would make up for my off-plan Friday and Saturday - but no-o-o-o. Oh, well, can't feel bad about it.

Food Log 

Breakfast
Skipped.

Lunch
7:10pm:  Chopped salad with roast beef, shaved parmesan cheese, kale, spinach, chard, cabbage and balsamic vinaigrette.

Dinner
11:45pm:  Almond butter, cottage cheese and a Quest bar.

Liquid Intake
   Espressos: 1;  Coffee:  0 oz.;  Water: 48+ oz. 

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